This weekend we celebrated the 29th birthday of FnJ’s own Jewsh, so this week’s edition of Game+Watch is dedicated to him. Which is quite fitting since this week’s selections are appropriately weak, like Jewsh’s video game skills. Ahhh, I’m just kidding brother, we love ya. Let me just say that I love me some Queen, but I don’t do Singstar and will once again refrain from dropping forty to sixty bucks into the industry that I love so dearly. These Summer months can be brutal on those of us with irresponsible spending habits and a love of gaming, but it’s pretty easy to see that there are better ways to spend your money than on a video game adaptation of G.I. Joe…

Puppies, ugly babies, when a week’s release schedule fails to impress me or inspire me enough to write about the merits of each individual title, I seek inspiration elsewhere. I delve deeply into the dark recesses of my twisted sense of humor and strive to transform an otherwise weak……week into one that I can be proud of. This week I’d like to find a theme that links each of the week’s releases together. It could be something as obvious and patriotic as featuring guns, which not all these titles do, or it could be something more subtle like a theme of vengeance or love, which there isn’t. When one of the games coming out this week is Daisy Fuentes Pilates, the task of discovering a unifying theme is not an easy one.

Is there anything more American than sword-swinging, gun toting super soldiers like in G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra or culturally insensitive Native-American characters with face paint and mohawks as in Brave: A Warrior’s Tale? Perhaps this is our theme. Ultimate Duck Hunting for the Wii also features an American past-time, and allows players to customize their own hunting dog! Americans love dogs! I know I’m reaching here, and I still don’t quite know where Singstar: Queen for the PS2 and PS3 fits in, but you know what? I just told you about every retail release for the first week of August. My work is done here. Look below for pretty pictures of box art.